Pink Carnation
by EllieLovesYou
Summary: And sometimes as she struggled to stay awake, her last thought was how her momma had always kissed her head and whispered a name that didn't belong to either of them, a name that was foreign but awoke something inside her each time she said it 'Judith'
1. Annabelle

_**Yeah….**_

Beth grunted as she landed on her side she immediately reached up and pulled the tiny girl next to her down to the floor, she covered the girl's mouth and pulled her under the car. She initially struggled but quickly settled and cuddled herself against Beth's chest, Beth shushed her quietly and patted her hair down and kissed her forehead.

Low groans were heard and the tiny girl buried herself deeper into Beth's chest and shed quiet tears and fisted Beth's shirt as she struggled to keep her composure, Beth tightened her hold on the girl and shut her eyes as she saw the struggling figures move by the car they were currently under.

What seemed like forever later (it was about 20 minutes later) the horde passed and Beth made them stay under the car for another five minutes before she let the girl go and both of them scooted themselves out from under the car. The little girl brushed her clothes clean from loose asphalt and her face of her fallen tears- she hated when she cried "Momma?" Beth's head snapped to the little girl

"Yeah?"

"When are you gonna find some other people?"

Beth sighed and for once in the girl's life she felt like she saw some form of sadness on her momma's face "I don't know, baby" she simply nodded her head and took her momma's hand and together they walked off the road and into the woods that were nearby. They were deep into the forest when they set up camp- it was a tiny, cramped tent and some cans that they would wrap around their camp.

They were settled into their tent when she spoke again "Momma?"

"Hmm?"

"Can you sing?"

"Annabelle" her momma said warningly

"Please Momma, it's been a while since you last sang"

A beat of silence passed and Beth shifted and wordlessly nodded she pulled the girl to her chest and started humming lowly "_Oh all __the money that e'er I spent__, __I spent it in good company__, __And all the harm that e'er I've done__Alas, it was to none but me And all I've done for want of wit_ _To memory now I can't recall__So fill to me the parting glass__Good night and joy be with you all"_ she slowly drifted off as her momma's voice broke at the end, she never could finish the end of that song.

And probably one of the last things that crossed Annabelle's mind as she struggled to stay awake was how her momma had always kissed her head and whispered a name that didn't belong to either of them, a name that was foreign but awoke something inside her each time she said it

'Judith'

_**Reviews?**_


	2. I Sure Hope Not

_**Soooo this is very au as you will find this chapter. A few things you should know: Lori is alive, Patricia and Otis lived longer than on the show and Rick and the main groups are at the prison. Any other questions? Message me or comment and I will address it.**_

Annabelle's eyes fluttered open as she heard the loud clang of the cans hitting each other, her arm flew to hit her mom and alert her but found nothing but a cold space. She threw the thin blanket off that covered her body and poked her head out of the tent; she visibly relaxed when she saw it was just her mom putting the cans in her pack.

Beth turned around and noticed the tiny brunette's head peeking out "Hey sleeping beauty" Annabelle smiled

"Mornin' momma"

Beth nodded her head towards her "You mind packin' up the tent for me?" Annabelle shook her head and quickly emptied the tent of its contents and started to pack the tent which she stuffed into her own pack along with the blanket. They were gone within minutes of the girl waking up and with Annabelle's hand wrapped firmly around her own, Beth started making her way to the main road and hoped that her and her daughter would live to see another day.

**X**

"Mom" Carl quickly ran up to his mother who was almost as shot as he was, he tugged on her hand to make her turn around "Mom, talk to me"

Lori sighed and placed her hands on her hips she looked back to their camp which held the rest of their group "I don't know what you want me to say"

Carl sighed and placed his hands on his mother's shoulders "Get it out"

"Carl-"

He cut his mother off swiftly "Mom, it's okay to be upset"

She sighed "Fine" she crossed her arms over her chest "It's not fair okay?" her voice broke and she pointed a finger back to the camp "It's not fair that Maggie can have and keep her children and I can't" she wiped her face of her fallen tears "It's not fair that I carried your sister for nine months, gave birth to her, bonded and fell in love with her and she just-" a sob from her own mouth cut her off, she leaned over and let out a deep breath before she continued "And she just goes away. My baby girl is gone and Maggie just had her daughter and gets to hold her and love her"

The now nineteen year old Carl nodded and held his mom to his chest as she heaved out deep, broken breaths. Eventually she was able to compose herself "I'm sorry, Carl" she said quietly "You shouldn't have to deal with me like this"

"If Dad isn't going to then I will" Lori nodded and kissed her son's forehead

"I love you Carl"

He smiled and wrapped his arm around his mom's waist "Love you too now let's go see baby Beth"

Lori sniffled "Yeah let's go see her"

**X**

"Momma" Annabelle said urgently as she tugged on her shirt

"What?"

"Look" Annabelle pointed a finger in the direction and Beth's head snapped to see two or three walkers trudging their way towards them, lowly growling attracting the attention of more walkers.

"Come one baby" she tugged on her daughters hand and the seven year old quickly started running in front of her mother,' always in front' is what her momma told her. They ran until they came across a car that had the front window shattered but the back was fine "Hurry get in" Beth commanded and Annabelle quickly followed her orders.

Beth and Annabelle quickly set themselves in the back of the car on the floor and pulled the blanket from their pack and threw it over their heads. Low groans were heard and it took everything in Annabelle to not move to go to her momma, she had to stay put. A particularly loud growl followed by a scream made Annabelle and Beth jump, but the retreating footsteps made their heart pace ease.

'Stay Here' is what Beth mouthed to Annabelle as she threw the blanket off herself but made sure to keep her daughter concealed, she carefully climbed to the front and looked out the front shattered window. There was a man who was currently being torn apart by walkers and while it was sad Beth had to get Annabelle out of the car so she took advantage of his death.

She and Annabelle quickly but as quietly as possible crept out of the car and made their way into the woods that surrounded the woods, neither of them would spare a glance to them man who unknowingly saved their lives.

"Momma" Beth looked to her daughter; they had gone deep into the woods and now both were sitting by a small fire that Beth had made for them.

"Yes?"

"I miss Aunt Patricia" Beth sighed and put the rabbit that they were eating down; Patricia had been Beth's best friend even though she was significantly older than her. Patricia helped Beth with Annabelle when she was still a baby, Patricia had played with Annabelle when Beth was busy or tried, and Patricia had been bit only 6 months ago.

"I miss her too, baby"

"Uncle Otis too" Otis died when Annabelle was about 4

"Yeah baby me too"

"Will we ever find another group?"

Beth looked down at the fire and was suddenly brought back to when she did have a group, a group that held her family, a group that had given her Annabelle, a group that had almost gotten her killed along with Annabelle. Beth shook her head slightly to rid herself of those memories "I don't know"

"Momma?" Annabelle saw the pain etched on her mother's face

"Hmm?"

"You're the only group I'll ever need" Beth smiled and felt tears well up in her eyes; she wiped them before they could fall. Beth moved and sat down next to Annabelle and kissed her forehead

"You're the only group I'll ever _want_" Annabelle smiled and laid her head on her mother's chest

"Momma?"

"Hmm?"

"I love you" she raised her head and looked into her mom's eyes "I forgot to tell you today"

Beth smiled and leaned down and kissed her daughter's nose and pushed a lock of hair behind her ear "I love you too, Anna" she placed another kiss on her forehead "A lot" Beth leaned back on her back and let Annabelle rest her head on her stomach "You know who else loves you?"

Annabelle internally rolled her eyes; her momma always did this "Grandpa?"

"Yup, who else?"

"Aunt Maggie and Uncle Glenn" Beth hummed a bit and started to stroke her daughter's hair

"Who else?"

"Rick and Carl"

"And?"

"Lori"

"Yup"

"Momma?"

"Yeah?"

"Will I ever meet these people?"

Beth stilled her movements for a minute and thought for a second "I sure hope not, baby"

**X**

Rick lay beside his wife and moved to hold her against her chest "I'm sorry" he said softly "I should've been there but Glenn and Maggie needed me and I couldn't- I wasn't going to leave them"

Lori didn't speak for a second "I understand"

"I know you miss her- we all do but Lori it's been 7 years. Don't you think we should try and move on" Lori turned around so she was facing her husband

"She was our daughter, Rick"

"And Beth was Maggie's sister but she can talk about her"

Lori sighed and turned back around "You don't understand"

Rick sat up "You're right I really don't" he sighed and put his face in his hands "Why can't you let her go?"

"Because Rick, she's still alive!"

"What are you talkin' about?"

Lori groaned , she sat up and looked at him "I feel it in my gut- she's alive and I-" she took a ragged breath in "She's alive"

Rick placed a hand on Lori's shoulder "Lori, she was just a baby- she couldn't have survived"

"Maybe Beth isn't dead then"

"Don't go going around spreading stuff like that"

"Rick for all we know she _is_ alive"

Rick sighed and got up from the bed "No Lori. She's dead. Our daughter is dead, Judith doesn't exist because of the attack and you know this" he pointed his finger at her "So stop with all this bullshit" he stomped his way out of the cell they shared and Lori bit her lip to keep her tears at bay.

She lay down and buried her face in her pillow, she knew she daughter was alive she just knows it. Mothers always know.

Little did she know how right she was.

And how wrong she was.

_**Reviews?**_


	3. Somewhere Over The Rainbow

_**Sorry for the wait!**_

Annabelle groggily rubbed her eyes as she stretched out her arms hitting the tent and her momma in the ear "Ow" Beth grumbled quietly as she awake from her light sleep, she rubbed her ear

Annabelle tried to keep her giggle in "Sorry momma" Beth smiled at her brunette daughter; she leaned over and kissed her forehead

"It's alright" Beth moved until she was sitting up and she rubbed at her eyes just as Annabelle had done "Now let's get up- we got to pack up and keep movin'"

"Kay momma" both girls climbed out of their dark green tent and Beth collected the cans while Annabelle wrapped everything and stuffed in it in her pack. She threw the bag over she shoulder, threw dirt on the small fire that had been burning and picked up her stuffed duck that had fallen on the floor. She brushed it off and tucked it under her arm before she made her way over to Beth

"Ready?" Annabelle nodded and interlaced her hand with Beth's and both started making their way towards the main road.

**X**

"Mornin'" Lori said as she sat down on the edge of Maggie's bed, the second time mother looked exhausted

"Hi" Maggie said tiredly, she pushed herself up into a sitting position and stretched out her arms

"How are you feeling?"

Maggie shrugged and peeked into the crib by her bed that held her barely 2 day old daughter "Alright I guess still tired but that's expected"

Lori nodded along and stood up she walked over and looked into the crib, Baby Beth looked just like Maggie with very few features from Glenn but one of those features was her black hair that sprouted from her head. "She really is gorgeous, Maggie"

Maggie smiled softly "Yeah she is

"How's Jonah takin' to her?" Lori asked referring to Maggie and Glenn's four year old son

Maggie scoffed "As well as expected, keeps clinging to me and Glenn thinkin' we're gonna abandon him"

Lori smiled softly and wanted to talk about Judith but she felt her stomach twist and her heart clench, she swallowed back unshed tears "Imma go check on the kids" Lori said quickly and then quickly walked out of Maggie's cell.

She turned into her cell and tugged the make shit curtain to hide herself from curious eyes, she fell on her bed and curled into herself and let out silent tears only thinking about her baby girl.

**X**

"Momma?"

Beth looked down at her daughter as they approached an abandoned church "Hmm?"

"Why we always gotta go back to the woods?" Annabelle's face scrunched up "I don't like it"

Beth sighed "I don't either baby but it's safer there"

"Why?" The small brunette asked curiously

The blonde pushed the doors open and was about to answer when the low groaning of a lone walker filled her ears, she immediately shoved Annabelle to the side and retrieved her knife from her belt. She approached the walker who just now noticed her presence and started to growl hungrily, and jammed into the walker's temple. Beth grunted as she used her sweater covered hand to push the undead off her knife, once he fell Annabelle rushed over and latched to her momma's legs "That's why"

Annabelle nodded against her mother's legs and clutched her tighter, Beth sighed and leaned over and picked up the seven year old. Annabelle wrapped her legs around her momma's waist and threw her arms around her neck.

Annabelle never did well when it came to walkers, mostly because Beth and Patricia had risen her on the idea 'run and hide don't kill' mostly because Otis died killing a walker that didn't need to be killed. It could've been avoided and that enough was heartbreaking so the small girl grew up thinking that you don't have to kill one unless absolutely necessary. Like now.

Beth pushed through another door and found nothing but an empty room the walls were splattered with blood and the carpet had something growing from it but it was secure. There was a window that could be covered and the door had a lock- they could set up here and be fine for a couple days at least. So the blonde put her daughter down and instructed her to unpack which caused the little girl's face to scrunch up "Unpack?" she looked around "Here?"

Beth nodded "It's safe for at least a few days plus you did say you didn't like the forest" Annabelle's face broke into a smile and she wrapped her arms around her momma's waist.

"Thanks momma" Annabelle said gratefully and Beth simply smiled and hoped nothing would go wrong.

She was wrong.

**X**

Rick knocked on the cell wall of Maggie's cell "How you feelin'?"

"Okay" Rick smiled and moved to stand by Beth's crib

"I don't ever remember Judith or Carl being this small" Maggie's face darkened and the ex-sheriff noticed "Maggie?"

She looked up innocently "What?"

"What happened?"

"Nothing" she squeaked out

Rick sighed and placed his hands on his hips "Maggie…"

"Lori came by"

"Oh Lord- what'd she do?"

Maggie shook her head "Nothin' but I think you should talk to her" Rick raised his eyebrow at her "About Judith"

"Oh"

"Yeah" Rick opened his mouth to reply but a small boy with brown hair breezed by him and jumped on Maggie's bed "Hey baby boy" Maggie said happily as she kissed every inch of his face

"Hi momma!" he turned his head to Rick "Hi Rick!"

Rick forced a smile on his lips and leaned over and ruffled his hair 'Hey Jonah"

"Whatchu' doin here?"

"Just visiting Beth"

Jonah's eyes brightened "That's my sister!" Rick laughed

"Yeah it is" he pushed himself up from the bed "Imma go- you take care of your momma, kay?" the little boy saluted and Rick smiled and started to walk out when Maggie's voice stopped him

"Rick!" he turned back to her "Please talk to her- she looks like she's in a lot of pain" Rick nodded and left her cell and immediately went for his own.

He opened the curtain to see his wife laying down staring at the wall; she looked distant and barely acknowledged his presence. He sat down and patted her leg but she didn't move "You know I still remember when she was born" nothing "You were screaming at me that you hated me and you never wanted to have sex again and you damn near broke my hand" Lori sat up abruptly

"I don't want to do this" she started for the door but Rick stood in front of her

"But when she came out- you cried. You cried like she was crying and you didn't want to put her down for the first three days"

"Rick, let me out" he pushed her slightly and turned around and quickly shut the bars, he turned back to her

"And you remember how she looked?" he blew out a breath "God she was gorgeous- she had my eyes but she looked like from her hair to her nose"

Lori let out a cry "Stop!"

"And you looked down at her and you promised you would always love and protect her and Lori, you did everything you could" he looked his wife in the eye "You did everything but no one could save her- she was already gone"

Lori collapsed in a heap against her husband, she was sobbing, her nose was running, and she felt like she was feeling her heartbreak all over again "I loved her" she cried out pathetically "I wanted to save her"

Rick held her against her chest and quietly shushed her "I know, I know"

"I just wanted to protect her" she sobbed out

Rick let his own tears fall and he kissed the crown of her head "I know, Lori. I know"

**X**

Beth held her daughter against her like she was cradling the girl, she kissed her forehead and Annabelle sighed. She loved when they could just cuddled and not worry for a minute, for a seven year old she had too much worry in her life. "Momma?"

"Hmmm?"

Annabelle shifted her head to look up at her mom "Sing?"

Beth sighed and readjusted Annabelle but didn't disagree instead she took a breath and started to sing a song Annabelle didn't recognize, a song her momma had never sang before _"__Somewhere, over the rainbow, way up high, There's a land that I heard of once in a lullaby, Somewhere, over the rainbow, skies are blue, And the dreams that you dare to dream really do come true, Someday I'll wish upon a star, And wake up where the clouds are far behind me, Where troubles melt like lemon drops, Away above the chimney tops, That's where you'll find me"_

Annabelle didn't know the song but she liked it.

**X**

Carl approached Daryl with a gun strapped to his side "Daryl!" the hunter turned around

"What?"

"We need to go on a run"

"Why?"

"Because Daryl there's a baby now- we need baby stuff"

"Fine but I'm goin alone"

"Daryl-"a hand on his shoulder stopped him; he turned his head to see Andrea

'Carl you will sooner get Rick to admit that staying in one place is a bad idea than getting Daryl to agree to a mission with more than just him"

Carl looked back to Daryl "Fine but if you die- it's not my fault"

Daryl scoffed and threw his crossbow over his shoulder "I don't die, kid"

**X**

It had been a day and a half in the back room of the church when they heard it- it was a loud crash like someone knocked the podium over. Beth immediately shot up and pushed Annabelle to get everything packed up but then the doorknob startled to rattle and Beth's heart dropped. She was too late.

She beckoned Annabelle over and brought out her gun, a gun she never used, and aimed it at the door she wasn't going to let anybody to take _her_ daughter.

The door rattled a few more times till it grew quiet and Annabelle let out a breath but Beth quieted her, it wasn't going to be that easy.

Of course Beth was right this time.

The door knob was knocked off and that left the door to swing freely, she cocked her gun and a figure stepped through the door.

No one breathed.

"Beth?"

"D-Daryl?"

_**Please review!**_


	4. God's Fucked Up Will

_**Sorry for the wait!**_

Hershel Greene stumbled to his daughter's cell he had been nearly shaking with anticipation all day to his granddaughter, he pushed the curtain open and his heart swelled at the sight of Maggie holding baby Beth "Hey baby" he spoke gently

She smiled "Hey daddy"

He made his way over on his crutches to her bed and made an 'ommpff' sound when he hit the bed; he put his crutches off to the side and made grabby hands for his granddaughter. Maggie laughed and leaned over and handed him the baby, Hershel gently cradled her head and felt a swirl of emotions fill him.

"She's beautiful baby" he whispered out "She looks like you when you were a baby"

" 'Cept she's got Glenn's hair" she laughed "It's gonna be hell to manage when she's older"

Hershel laughed "It's going to be just like having Beth all over again"

Maggie let out a bark or laughter "Oh her hair was always everywhere" she smiled " I remember one summer when she didn't take it out of braids for two weeks and, God, it drove Annette crazy"

"I remember that- damn if it wasn't hard for her to brush the rat's nest that had become her hair" Hershel laughed and it died down and he felt a pang in his heart. He leaned over and grabbed one of Maggie's hands "Your sister would have loved that you named her Beth"

Maggie still had a smile but it was sadder "She hated her name, daddy"

"Yeah but" he looked down at Baby Beth "She'll love it"

"I miss her daddy"

"I do too baby but she wouldn't want us goin' crazy missin her"

Maggie's laugh was watery "Yeah because 'we all got jobs to do'" she said quoting her sister

"Yeah" Hershel breathed out, he looked down at his new Beth "We do"

**X**

Lori sluggishly awoke to a cold bed she wasn't bothered by it too much till she realized what Rick had done and she felt hurt. He pushed her. She wasn't ready.

'Even after 8 years?' a little voice asked from deep within her mind and she felt her heart break because even after 8 years she still isn't ready and Lori doesn't know if she ever will be.

The woman threw her arm over her herself with a blanket and curled into herself, she just wanted her Judith, her baby, her daughter. Her hand drifted down to her stomach and tried to remember what it felt like to feel her kick from inside her but not matter how much she tried to conjure the feeling- she just couldn't.

She felt tears threaten to spill and she pushed them back till she felt cold from the inside, till she knew they wouldn't spill. She wiped at her dry face and she felt more tear threaten to spill as she realized she couldn't remember how anything felt from her pregnancy. Nothing. It was all gone. It was fading too fast.

She was losing her daughter all over again.

And she couldn't stop it.

**X**

Beth dropped her hand to her side and stumbled back a bit as she tried to comprehend who exactly was standing in front of her- Daryl Dixon. Oh shit.

She grabbed Annabelle's arm and pushed herself passed Daryl who looked just as shocked as she did and who only snapped out of his trance when he felt Beth brush against him to leave, his arm flew back but she was already running away from him "Beth!"

He started running and saw that she was just leaving the church but still running, the little girl was slowing her down. He ran and ran until he was in front of her "Beth" he breathed out

"Move Daryl" the blonde commanded the little girl cowered behind Beth but he ignored her

"Beth, where've you been?" his voice was soft

"Like any of you care" her voice was hard and steel, a tone he had never heard her take.

"Beth"

"Daryl move" it wasn't so hard anymore, it sounded like a plead and it sounded...almost broken.

"Beth please, talk to me"

"Momma who is he?" the little girl croaked out- she looked terrified but Daryl couldn't focus on anything but what she had just called Beth. He looked at the brunette child for a second before raising his head to look at Beth

"Momma?" he asked confusion clear in his voice

"Daryl please-"she was cut off when Daryl simply fell to his knees and looked Annabelle in the eye

"How old are you?" the little girl cowered behind her mother's leg "How old are you?" she didn't answer and Daryl moved and grabbed her and shook her "How old are you?" he sounded almost hysterical

She started crying and then all of the sudden Daryl felt the coldness from a gun pressed against his temple "Let her go" Beth's voice was cold and it scared Daryl if he was honest, Beth had been a lot of things but cold was never been one of them.

He raised his hands and stood up slowly but he kept eye contact with Beth the whole time "How old is she Beth?" she broke eye contact but kept her gun up "Beth" it was firm "How old is she?"

"God damn it Daryl" she said suddenly "Just let it go"

"No" it wasn't yelled or screamed but it was firm and Beth knew that tone as his 'take-no-shit' tone "How old is she?"

Beth struggled to keep her tears behind her eyes and she dropped the gun to her side, she let out a long broken breath "She's seven" she raised her head and looked him in the eyes "Nearly eight"

His heart dropped and he looked at the little girl and her familiar blue eyes "Is she…?" he trailed off "That ain't possible" she turned around and then whipped around and looked at Annabelle "She isn't her"

Beth sighed "She is"

"I looked everyday" he sounded panicked "I looked every goddamn day!" he wasn't really yelling at her and she knew that "How can you _both_ be here?"

Beth laughed a humorless laugh "God's fucked up will"

"This can't be right"

"But it is"

So she's-"

"Judith?" Daryl looked up at her "Yeah she's Judy"

"God damn it, Beth!" he looked at her like she was crazy "And she calls you momma?!"

"Why wouldn't she?! I have raised her for the past 8 freaking years! She's my baby!" Beth was pissed. She never wanted to find them because she knew this would happen. They would take Annabelle. They would take her will to live.

"She's got a momma who's gon crazy with grief" Daryl was probably just as pissed "You took her" he spit out

"What did you want me to do? Huh? Leave her to die? She was alone Daryl! I found her in that shit crib alone, no one cared and no one looked so I took her"

Annabelle tugged on her momma's sleeve "Momma?" Beth was pulled from her anger and she realized she shouldn't have said half the things she had just spewed out, she crouched down to Annabelle's height

"yeah baby?"

"You're my momma, right?" Beth nodded feverishly

"Yes baby I am. I raised you right?" Annabelle nodded "I protected you?" she nodded "I love you" it wasn't a question but Annabelle still nodded "Then I am your momma but you didn't come from my tummy"

Annabelle's face scrunched together "I'm confused momma" Beth smiled and kissed her forehead

"Don't worry about it baby" she pushed herself to a standing position and looked at Daryl "I am her mother"

"Lori's her mother" he shot back easily

"Like hell she is" Beth pushed Daryl out of her way and stomped away but was quickly yanked back by a strong arm

"Lori deserves to know"

"Daryl, please, just leave us alone" she looked down at Annabelle "We have been doin' fine for the past 8 years- we don't need you now"

"Beth…"

"No! She's my baby and my daughter and you won't take her"

"She'll be safe if you go with us" he looked from the girl to Beth "You both will"

"No one is really safe" Beth whispered out

"But it's your best bet" he sighed "Beth please"

She looked at him and knew that he could protect them from walkers but he couldn't protect them from Lori and what she would do to the family and life Beth had built. She looked down at her daughter and she knew her answer so she picked her head back up and looked Daryl straight into his eyes "No"

_**Yup….review?**_


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